Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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