2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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