she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
