Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Randomize