I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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