apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
