Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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