How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
