is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
