It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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