it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
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