I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
organizing the empties. That sober.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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