Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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