Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
