somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
