Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
