I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
