If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Randomize