talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
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