There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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