it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
