thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
