how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
