If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
