just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
