I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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