You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
