Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
