Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
