seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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