I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
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You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
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"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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