Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize