what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
