watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
