Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
