She's JV to your varsity
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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