I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
