Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
