To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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