i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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