u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Randomize
