Ambien. No doubt about it.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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