..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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