he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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