How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
