So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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