You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
