so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
