its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
this just has baby written all over it
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
