Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Randomize
